Hey superachievers! I am very sad to say that my beloved coach, mentor, friend, and colleague of many years recently passed away quite unexpectedly. This has led to a deep reflection of my time with her and what she has taught me over the years. I have already shared several of my learnings from this amazing soul in podcasts, blogs, and videos, including an interview of her in the early days of the Quit Bleeping Around podcast. One of the things she taught me while mentoring me as a coach many years ago is that sometimes we need to celebrate our achievements by what is no longer present.
When we set a goal and go after it with all that we have, we generally focus on what we are gaining from that goal. For example, let’s say you want that promotion so you can get a pay raise. Once you achieve it, you focus on all that you’ve gained – a new income level, you’re able to adjust your quality of life or savings or whatever else a promotion allows you; however, as you quickly grow accustomed to what you’ve gained, you forget about what is no longer present – perhaps it is a struggle to make the bills each month, or that you no longer have to hold your breath hoping that you come out even each month as you had been living paycheck to paycheck.
Not only does this tactic help with realizing just how far you’ve come, but it also helps with reminding you to have gratitude for what you do have. When I ask myself what is no longer, I think about how the relationship with my husband is so much easier and drama free than with my first marriage. I think about how grateful I am to be living a life I never thought possible. I also think about how free my mind and thoughts are since I have implemented mindfulness in my life.
What is no longer for you? What is now absent from your life due to your personal development efforts? Your professional development efforts? What has changed – what is no longer – because you set a goal and achieved it? Take some time to reflect on this today, perhaps write it down in your gratitude journal (or start one if you don’t have one yet). The more you focus on how you’ve grown and show gratitude for it, the more of the same you will attract in your life.
I’d like to dedicate this blog posting to an amazing soul, my friend, coach, and colleague, Nancy Duncan.